The CW
Tuesday nights

When The CW announced that they were “keeping a lid on 90210” so we could all enjoy it at once…well, we should have known.  First off, the entire colour palette is lime green – as in CW green, lest we forget what network we are watching.  Then, there’s the adoption storyline in the Wilson family – you know, just to mix it up.  I don’t know if they were looking to bring this show back as an homage or a re-imagining or whatever.  In any event, the end result is like ‘7th Heaven’ trying to be ‘Gossip Girl’ and it just don’t work, y’all.  Sure, “Spring Awakening” is the theatre department’s fall show,  Sure, that girl is sixteen years old.  Sure.  Jessica Walter’s talents are unfortunately wasted here in a dumbed down version of her ‘Arrested Development’ character.  Clearly all the juicy dialogue went to Lori Loughlin (honey, you look great!)…lines like: “I could drive you home and we could swap stories about Harry’s penis!”  CW, I hate to break it to you, but I won’t allow space for this one on my TiVo.  I need to save the prime real estate there for ‘Gossip Girl’ which is still the bestest guilty pleasure on your network.  Sorry ’bout it.