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Somewhere out there, Nicholas Sparks is eating a box of Triscuits and lovin’ on the cheese-fest that is so gooily close to his own oeuvre. Much like cherry-flavoured cough syrup, the Lifetime series ‘Army Wives,’ is entirely too sweet and sticky as it goes down. The dialogue is trite, to say the least, and some of the décor, is just too much too handle. If you look closely at the office of a high-ranking commander, you will see a bookshelf sporting Danielle Steele and Michael Crichton. Guess the props department was fresh out of Sun Tzu. Unfortunately for yours truly (as I jot down snarky remarks on my steno pad), the storylines are pretty damn good. One of the “wives” is a husband, whose wife returns with some heavy-duty PTSD. Jason Wiles (go-go-gadget ‘Third Watch’!) has a one and a half episode arc where he takes a couple captives as he copes with the same thing. There’s the newly-weds who are still in the throes of puppy love, a mom getting abused by her son, and a husband who has returned more Muslim than Christian. The broad strokes the show paints are of a really effed up army, but some great effing people who stand by it, and, of course, by one another. The best news of the show is the Coyote Ugly character of Roxy LeBlanc, played by Sally Pressman, who adds spunk, charm and stick-to-it-iveness to the lot. ‘Army Wives’ has some good things to say – too bad it tends to trip over its message with the schmaltz factor.