You can have Times Square. I’ll watch the ball drop on TV… with remote in hand. Here are the viewing choices, from mild (Dick Clark) to wild (Tila Tequila):

Dick Clark’s New Year’s Rockin’ Eve 2008 (10 p.m, ABC)
Ryan Seacrest does most of the heavy lifting now but Clark, who had a stroke in 2004, is back for a 36th year. Performances by Carrie Underwood, Miley Cyrus and the Jonas Brothers. Fergie returns to host and perform at the Hollywood celebration, along with Akon, Natasha Bedingfield, Sean Kingston, OneRepublic, Plain White T’s, Taylor Swift and will.i.am.

New Year’s Eve Live (11 p.m., Fox)
Cat Deeley (Fox’s So You Think You Can Dance) hosts. Performances by “American idol” winner Jordin Sparks and runner-up Blake Lewis and Lifehouse.

New Year’s Eve With Carson Daly (11:35 p.m., NBC)
Daly has Alicia Keys performing atop Rockefeller Center and Lenny Kravitz in Times Square.

Tila Tequila’s New Year’s Eve Masquerade 2008  (11 p.m., MTV)
The “Shot At Love” star hosts a costume party live from the network’s Times Square studio. Performances and appearances: Mary J. Blige, Kid Rock, Fabolous, Paramore, Good Charlotte, Wyclef Jean, Boys Like Girls, Flo Rida and Cobra Starship. Entertainment blogger Perez Hilton joins the party.