It’s the show we all watch for ten minutes before gagging, and it’s back (yet again). “The Bachelor” has become the desperation theme song for single ladies with TiVo, and this time it’s the poor guy’s birthday. If these girls are making any kind of a statement, it’s this: stay in school, stay out of middle America, and if you dig hard enough in the crevices of your bargain basement prom dress, you might just find a tiny crumb of self-esteem. One of them has eyeballs the size of grapefruits, one has Sanjaya’s vocal talents, and the rest of the lot are bursting at the cleavage line with good intentions and the baking skills of a meerkat. I’m hating every minute of it and I can’t wait until next week.